When friends gather around a table to share some cancer on a nice time out of the routine…the result can be nothing but a nice conversation. The main on the menu was sex vs culture. It is rather amusing once you find yourself investigating the legal age vs the right age…especially when at the end of the day, age doesn’t really matter.
“Virginity. When to lose it and with whom? Is it such a big deal?”
Such a catchy title, isn’t it? Well, my answer to that would be go with the flow and definitely question yourself whether you feel ready and if yes…whether you feel comfortable. Sexual intercourse is nothing that should be planned, or guided by societal demands or even religious ones, it is about your, your partner’s body and both of your states of mind and emotions. It’s not a holiday so, you don’t need to preplan it or anything stressful as that, it’s a natural act of communication, connection and exploration of someone you feel comfortable with and of course yourself. It is an important step but definitely not such a big deal. Important step in regards to the fact that it might affect your later sexual life and the way you perceive sex but it is going to be weird and awkward in a sense. So, make sure you understand what sex is and whether you feel ready to do it, I guess.
With whom?…Jeez I love that question.
You might choose to do it on a one night stand just to get rid of the label without dealing with the awkwardness if any with your partner since you are not going to see this person again.
You might choose to do it with your long-term partner, because you are ready to make the further step into getting to know him/her better.
Either way, what is important is you to feel comfortable with yourself, your body, any situation you are choosing to put yourself into and not to stress out, besides no one was born a professional at this.
And if you are wondering the idea of sex after marriage is extremely utopic. I mean…you might end up with the feeling that maybe you do not really match so I do not think you should risk it. Though a marriage is nothing but a well paid relationship with an expiry date you still feel a bit forced to stick to it even if that is for a while, or at least that is my point of view.
Is there a number that is acceptable for before marriage relationships or even one night stands?
Of course NOT! Sex is not maths, sex is…something lovely that cannot be described neither by numbers or words.
And though, virginity is the “hot” topic to be discussed and be pressured about by peer groups, love is another topic put under judgement, just by uttering the phrase “I’m in love” is being judged by pretty much everyone around you. There is no such thing as mr special, nevertheless there is definitely a special someone for a certain period in one’s life. Someone that gives you security, affection and a stress relief when you need to. Someone who makes you feel comfortable to settle on when you need to or even someone with whom you can enjoy the silence by simply standing next to each other. Maybe I am just too romantic for this day and age when it comes to love, but hey! I am another fool that exposes myself to falling slowly, loving like crazy and dancing in the rain. I do not give a damn about expiry dates when you are at the beginning of something or at the edge before the beginning of something you need to free yourself and just make the most of it, even if that turns to a brilliant friendship or not seeing the person ever again. You have to risk it to get the biscuit and even if you don’t, at least you can proudly say you tried and that you enjoyed the ride even if the car broke down and you never reached your destination. My mentality has turned out to be, that plans are meant to work for things like education and occupation. When it comes to love and friendship, plans have no place there, you give it all and if you fall, you fix your eyes, stand up and move on. At the end of the day, you come alone, you go alone, people come and go and once this looney chance to live reaches its expiry date, nothing matters…at least end it with a smile.